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I Don't Think We're in Kansas Anymore is a Whateley Academy Generation 2 story written by ElrodW and Nagrij. It is about the arrival and first days at Whateley Academy by the new freshman. The first part was posted on 2016-05-31 and the last part was posted on 2016-08-16. It runs from 2016-09-06 through 2016-09-13. Preceding stories include: The Big Apple comes with Calamari and a number of other origin stories for kids that didn't get caught up in the New York mess.

It mostly takes place at Whateley Academy, with small parts taking place at secret bases in New York and Kansas City.


Part 1[]

Part 1


At the Dunwich train station, Jimmy Cannes tries to make some new friends, but his VI, Tavi, seems to be a bit better at that. Elaine Claire, the Dean of Students, gets the kids from the train sorted out and on the right buses.

Baily George’s mom, Dot, drops her off in the visitor’s parking lot. She gets checked in by Officer Kamos, Whateley security.

In London, Thulia checks on Morgana until she vanishes from mystic sight behind Whateley’s magical wards.

The bus from the train station arrives, disgorging kids and baggage into the visitor parking lot. The kids get sorted into groups for orientation tours. Krystal Barrett gets the changelings in the group.

Myoujin Hikaru arrives in the Embassy limo, and gets picked up by Tiff Lock for orientation. They discuss a number of things, including Kurenai.

In a secret lab in New York, Frau Dr. Stauffer proceeds on her secret research project to do something or other nefarious. She’s part of a larger organization, that seems to be heavily German, possibly Nazi related.

Krystal Bailey leads the five changelings on a tour. At the end, Security wants to see them. Then they rejoin Krystal at the Underdog table Morgana and Bianca decide to room together. Then they find out that Tia has unaccountably been assigned to Melville instead of Poe. Tia gets the Melville tour. She discovers a key to a Porsche in a Fruit of the Month basket. Oh, no, her sponsor, Ibby, didn’t. She did. It was high end, shocking pink and with the Playboy logo. She gets it registered and in a safe space in the Gearhead’s garage.

Part 2[]

Part 2

Laura and Baily decide to room together.

Krystal calls a wing meeting, and all the changelings share their stories.


The group meets for breakfast, and decides to reserve the table on the second floor. They have to be a training team to do it, so they decide to call themselves the Mutant Mayhem Machine, at least to start.

Tia sees her advisor, Dr. Bellows, one of the campus shrinks.

Laura has Jake Barton as her advisor, a retired superhero formerly known as Tractor.

Morgana has Madame Prudhomme as her advisor. She gets most of the courses she wants, but not all of them.

There is an all-cottage meeting to disclose and discuss the reason opening was delayed a week. It was bad. They lost Elizabeth Carson, the Headmistress, and a number of others. The new Headmaster is Geoffrey Mazarin, formerly known as Le Compte, a Syndicate honcho.

Part 3[]

Part 3

At breakfast, the Mutant Mayhem Machine fends off a few upperclassmen who want to dispute their possession of a second-floor table by letting them think they were in the Central Park fight in New York. Then they go shopping. Fox Hall is awesome. Tia is still in the dark about exactly what Hikaru is. Annette introduces the Poe girls to the Hydroflux.


In Kansas City at dinnertime Frau Dr. Stauffer is having a vocal disagreement with her boss, Major Smyth-Barnes. Things are not going as well as they could in her projects, and she has major disagreements with other participants in the organization.

NOTE: The sequence on this is wrong. It should be on Wednesday.

At dinner, MMM discusses their class schedules. The rumors are still going around. After dinner, Laura is approached by Valentina, who is very suggestively flirting.

The new students in Poe are given an orientation lecture by Bella Horton and Adam Babich, the house parents.

There is a meeting with the freshman girls in Melville. They discuss the change in administration, and then get booted out of the super-cool pool to the one they actually reserved.

Antonia catches Laura using the Hydroflux, and the two end up missing movie night.

Tia during Powers Testing. She’s told she’s now around Ex-2, and might get to Ex-3 in time.

Before lunch Tia runs into Jamie Howe, the devisor who turned her into a girl with GSD. She is understandably upset. Dr. Bellows hooks her up with Gerard Cox.

In the lunch line, Laura bumps into Nick and AJ, who were the kids in the Central Park mutant battle in New York. (NOTE - origin is The Road To Whateley.) Tanya and Vic arrive, having been delayed in Security for the battle with Ratel.

Several girls from the Venus, Inc. modeling club meet and decide they want to try to recruit some new members. The ideas include the bunny girl and the guy who practices martial arts and is really ripped.

Part 4[]

Part 4

During the lunch break, Hikaru has a discussion with Security Chief Everhart about the swords that have just been delivered, as well as Kurenai.

A meeting in a secret clubhouse, presumably of the Amazons, decides to do some recruiting, and makes the same mistake everyone else is making about who was in which fight.

Dr. Wyatt Cody interviews Hikaru.

Laura meets a number of new people, including Sequoia, Toison and Shisa. They head to the Village where there is a get-together scheduled with Jake Barton, the head of the history department. She sees a woman who has to be Mrs. Barton, her faculty advisor Jake Barton’s wife, who used to be Vanity Girl. They have a discussion about some things, including some of the other people in Jake Barton’s picture.

At dinner, Tia is still upset about her encounter with Jamie. Hikaru arrives, also a bit put out about her day in Powers Testing. A couple of the Amazons try to recruit Dragonsfyre and Eisenmädel. A couple of girls from Venus Inc. drop by to try to recruit Kenshin. He demurrs. Tia finally gets to tell the rest of the group about her encounter with Jamie.


Kenshin attracts a number of different admirers for his morning workout.

Laura goes to the gym for her martial arts placement exam. She watches Hikaru sparing against Genevieve Beaumont, and then has her test. She has to take Basic Martial Arts, but will be treated as a TA for the first few weeks.

Later that morning, in New York, Jennifer Kelly delivers a packet of magical gems, the Tears of Poseidon, to a client, Mr. Granier.

Alfred Bellows interviews Morgana. They go through the entire incident. (Insert reference to Blood Sisters). After lunch, one of the Amazons tries to recruit her.

Venus Inc. tries to recruit Kenshin. He’s still being bothered by gay-bashers.

Laura is shopping when Valentina tries to recruit her for the Amazons.

Laura and Bailey are out walking when they see some smoke. It turns out to be an encampment from The Nations, the Native American club. They get told that others are welcome, but not as voting members. Then on the way back they find a boy curled up on the road. They call security. He turns out to be an avatar with a spirit that likes to take naps.

That afternoon, Laura meets Morgana in the showers. Morgana experiments with a fast way of drying her hair.

Brita Baumann discovers that Morgana is a changeling. She does not like changelings. At all. She decides not to recruit them for the Amazons.

Part 5[]

Part 5

Laura heads to dinner with Kenshin and several girls. They’re stopped by a group of gay-bashers, who finally give up after the girls threaten them.

At dinner, Bianca is not happy. She spent all day in Powers Testing being retested; the testers are really interested in her “spirit.” Drop Bear drops over to the table to invite Morgana to The Commonwealth's meet and greet at the picnic tomorrow.

At the Poe cottage mixer, Brita gets in Morgana’s face about being a “fake” girl. The confrontation begins to escalate when it’s broken up by one of the security auxiliaries, a boy named Adam Hinz, who explains what Stahlfaust was trying to do.

Over in Melville, they’re having a mixer as well. Tia is enjoying herself when a couple of boys get in her face about who she is; that gets broken up and the boys are suitably punished. The party proceeds.

Meanwhile, in Manhattan, in a secret room, a dark sorcerer does a spell, and the result shows four possible locations. He picks the last one: someplace in New England. Back at Whateley, a door made of no earthly metal that should not be there briefly glows, and then vanishes.


Tia and Hikaru go for their driving test. They pass.

Laura and the other 700 students attend the opening day assembly.

The Amazons machinate a bit.

Tia and Hikaru head for the lake and the picnic. They take in a number of the clubs, including the science fiction club, The Commonwealth, and one of the martial arts clubs. Sylvester Blair invites Laura to an upcoming meeting of the Worn Wrench.

A pair of students report to Frau Stauffer about two students she’s interested in. These are presumably Tigger and Sentinal reporting on Laura and someone else who hasn't yet been identified.

Part 6[]

Part 6

The band Unladen Swallows was recruiting. They got Nick, Calliope and Laura.


Tia goes to the Catholic service at the Chapel.

At breakfast, they learn that Morgana had been jumped by Stahlfaust in a dead area, so there was no Security record of the incident. Hikaru tries to flash-step (short-range teleport) to the table, and manages to get food all over everyone. Oops. They discuss the clubs they’re interested in joining.

That afternoon, in Arena 99, they have the introduction to the Flight Club - a group that does flight-oriented games and challenges. They had a demonstration of air-ball.

Late that afternoon, Laura manages to make up with Antonia.

Stahlfaust gets manipulated by Antonia to imagine that Laura is stealing her girlfriend.

Eric Weber is in deep trouble because of being trapped into working for a Greek criminal family.

Laura gets a note, supposedly from Val, for a meeting behind Holbrook Arena. It’s a setup, of course. One of the “Guardians,” a secret group that’s apparently trying to be Ninjas, takes out the attacker.

In a secret room in New York, a very dark wizard does a spell that would drive an ordinary human insane in seconds. At the same time, in an abandoned tunnel below Whateley Academy, a curious shape pushes itself up from the floor, glows for a short time, and vanishes.


First day of classes. Laura is in History 201 - World History.

In Frau Stauffer’s lab. She get a call from “Sentinal.” Someone may have attempted to interfere with one of her subjects. Dr. Stauffer orders that they be taught a lesson. A painful lesson.

Laura’s second period class is Survival I in Arena 77 with Mr. Anderson. Presumably, this is Kurt Anderson. This session features Daleks spewing paintballs.

In early afternoon lunch, Laura has Workshop. They discover that she has a Gizbug 4000 on her, apparently without her knowledge. Someone is tailing her - or at least tailing someone.

At lunch, Laura learns that Hikaru had another burnout. She’s in Doyle for observation.

That evening, they visit Hikaru. They discover she has a bit of memory loss: she doesn’t remember Laura.

More secret stuff: someone tells someone else, probably a student, to locate recruits and to take down any student or organization that looks threatening in some unspecified way.

That evening, the changlings in Poe, including Tia get introduced to the secret “how to be a girl” class. The first lesson is on walking.


Early that morning, Bailey goes into the common room to find two girls tearing the place apart. One of them has lost a crystal pendant. She uses her psychometry power to locate it.

Headmaster Mazarin has a discussion with Assistant Headmaster Turner about school discipline.

Kenshin is in 2nd period English. It’s a make-up class.

Late that evening in Kansas City, Frau Dr. Stauffer injects her drug into another girl kidnapped off the street. She dies - messily.


Mostly in order of first appearance, although some characters are listed when the first member of their team, club or family appears, and some are listed twice.

Part 1[]

Part 2[]

  • Sophomores who are aggressively bi
  • Cheri
  • Deci
  • Cynthia
  • Kandace
  • Karla
  • Pam

Older stuff

Part 3[]

  • Three unnamed upperclassmen
  • Cindi - checkout girl at Fox Hall - (Background)
  • Herr Speer - WWII Nazi leader - (mention)
  • Jobe - Princess Jobe - (mention)

some Venus Inc. members

Part 4[]

  • Kodiak - Dr. Wyatt Cody - One of Whateley's shrinks. Okami's advisor
  • Perfume - Kim Hashida (Cassie Locke's roommate in Melville)
  • Mark Simmons. Student. Avatar of horned owl.
  • Silverblade - former student, on team with Ping-Pong and Mark
  • Amanda Tolman - Department head (whether it's all of PE or just Martial Arts isn't clear).

- - > from another thread that has no connection to this story.

  • Jennifer Kelly - Gem delivery person
  • Miss Halifax - Mr. Granier's secretary
  • Mr. Granier - recipient of gems

- -

Part 5[]

  • Drop Bear - student, heads Commonwealth club.

Bunch of people at the Poe mixer.

- - > Melville mixer

Several from the Cape squad

another group

At Whateley Academy Automotive Society meeting for testing.

  • Gearheads - the Gearheads
    • - Quinn
    • - Owen
    • J Dean - Justin (Senior RA from Melville - J Dean?
    • - Malcolm
    • - Janis - the Boxer girl???
    • - Nelson
  • three guys at the track - John, Jerry and Jeff

Some kids Stahlfaust is interested in recruiting

Anime club?

Commonwealth club

Martial Arts club

Worn Wrench (secret, sort of)


Whateley Literary Club (Lit Chix)

Sci-fi club

  • Two students watching two other students for Hilde Stauffer. The girl calls her "Tante Hilde" (Aunt), but it may be a more general term of respect. These are probably Tigger and Sentinel.

Part 6[]


  • Father Verraco - Catholic priest
  • Aerys - Airys (I presume this is the same person)
  • - Carrie
  • Owl - Mark
  • - Jean
  • - Arnold

Flight games

  • Thanagila - (means hummingbird) - Rose Little Deer - club president
  • Knockoff - - (mention)
  • Marvin Bates - club vice-president
  • Owl - Mark - club member and Thanagila's ... boyfriend. Weird relationship, there.
  • - Shauna -
  • Foxbat -
  • several fliers

Another plot

  • Catalyst - Eric Weber (in trouble, but not this story)
  • Peisinoe - Melina Stavros
  • Melina's father - head of a Greek criminal organization

And another plot

  • unnamed Ninja has TK power


Survival I


  • Angela Merenis - Workshop instructor
  • - Gordon - one of the TA's (Poe)
  • - TA # 2 - one of a pair of identical twin girls.
  • - TA # 3 - the other girl in the set.
  • Matsu - Michelle Brown - student - electronics
  • Michael Brown
  • Steve Gevorgian
  • Boltrunner - "energizer [...] "He discharges electrical energy. If he gets too excited," he threw his hands upward and outward, "Poof! Instant fried electronics.""

Some subterfuge going on

  • unnamed girl and boy
  • Holo -


  • A shadowy figure and a student planning very nefarious things.

And in Poe

2nd Period English Learners

Secret Lab

  • - Fred Drake - technician